i have been in naples (florida brookfield) for 24 hours and have adjusted well to my new golf resort neighborhood of white retirees.

in the first day alone, i have already:

1. begun yelling so my friends can hear me
2. been told to marry a man who makes a lot of money
3. eaten at perkin’s
4. stolen a full fistful of sugar packets from a restaurant
5. watched antique road show
6. eaten butter pecan ice cream
7. argued about whether or not the Jews really control the government. 

4 more days and i may assimilate completely.
maybe i’ll come home sporting a tremor.
WISH ME LUCK!